Turning Pain into Purpose: New Book ‘Big Boys Do Cry’ Reveals Power of Emotional Expression in Relationships

Merilee Kern
4 min readFeb 2, 2024

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With Valentine’s Day looming and amid the New Year refresh, now is the perfect time to explore the power of “radical vulnerability” among men. This concept is the foundational philosophy guiding the work of licensed clinical counselor, vulnerability coach, acclaimed author and international keynote speaker Ryan Joseph Kopyar — a transformational figure in the fields of psychology and personal development. From his own tragic and tumultuous past, Ryan has dedicated his life as a change catalyst for those seeking personal growth and emotional freedom to prosper both at home and in the workplace.

Through his counseling, coaching and speaking work, Ryan’s helps individuals reconnect with their hearts and learn healthy, effective ways of communication. With a unique blend of intense passion, an energizing persona, and a deep connection with his audiences, Ryan particularly works to inspire men on a journey of self-discovery and emotive healing.

Towards that end, in his newest book “Big Boys Do Cry: A Man’s Guide to Navigating Emotions and Showing Up More Vulnerable in Relationships,” Ryan provides men with guidelines and tactical skills they can use to better navigate emotions and more productively express their wants and needs in a healthy and effective way.

“It’s time to break the narrative about ‘men not being good communicators’ in relationships…or in general,” Ryan says.

In this raw and revealing book, Ryan also details the profound strength that men in particular can find in tears. It’s a revelation that took Ryan almost three decades to embrace after his own brush with substance abuse, the law and a horrifically tragic rape/homicide incident that took the life of both his mother and unborn (8 gestational month) sister.

“There is power — and purpose — in pain,” Ryan notes. “When I gave myself permission to cry and went through the motions on release, my life profoundly changed.”

Having realized his own intensive transformation, today Ryan’s guidance serves as a stepping stone for other men endeavoring toward their own emotional awakening. He’s helping men worldwide to defy societal norms, unabashedly cry, and embark on a path to deeper connections — the kind that fosters richer and more vulnerable relationships with their loved ones, friends and co-workers. “I want to reshape a ubiquitous false narrative with the proven fact that that tears are not a sign of weakness but rather a catalyst for transformative strength,” he says.

Other of Ryan’s life-changing works include the book “Unlock The Power of Your Mind” (2019) as well as his “Reconnect to Your Greatness” interactive virtual program, which teaches people how to remove the obstacles preventing them from realizing the happy, healthy and fulfilled life they want to live.

With a diverse background in counseling, holistic healing and hypnotherapy, Ryan is dedicated to helping others realize physical, mental and emotional balance. His “radical vulnerability” philosophy draws parallels between physical and mental flexibility, emphasizing the importance of overcoming past experiences to envision a brighter future.

There’s certainly no better time than right now to embark on a transformative journey towards a more balanced, happier and resilient life. So, go ahead and weep your way towards a wonderful new you. As Steven Tyler famously said, “every life has a measure of sorrow, and sometimes this is what awakens us.”

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Merilee Kern, MBA is an internationally-regarded brand strategist and analyst who reports on cultural shifts and trends as well as noteworthy industry change makers, movers, shakers and innovators across all categories, both B2C and B2B. This includes field experts and thought leaders, brands, products, services, destinations and events. Merilee is Founder, Executive Editor and Producer of “The Luxe List” as well as Host of theSavvy Living” lifestyle TV show that airs in New York, Los Angeles, San Francisco, Miami, Atlanta and other major markets on CBS, FOX and other top networks; as well as the “Savvy Ventures” business TV show that airs nationally on FOX Business TV and Bloomberg TV. Merilee also hosts the Savvy Ventures Podcast & Radio show available globally on W4CY Radio — the #1 ranked live streaming radio station — among others as well as all major podcast platforms, including Pandora, Audible, Spotify, Amazon Music, Apple Podcasts, Streamyard, iHeart Radio and dozens more. As a prolific lifestyle, travel, dining and leisure industry voice of authority and tastemaker, Merilee keeps her finger on the pulse of the marketplace in search of new and innovative must-haves and exemplary experiences at all price points, from the affordable to the extreme. Her work reaches multi-millions worldwide via broadcast TV (her own shows and copious others on which she appears) as well as a myriad of print and online publications. Connect with her at www.TheLuxeList.com and www.SavvyLiving.tv / Instagram www.Instagram.com/MerileeKern / Twitter www.Twitter.com/MerileeKern / Facebook www.Facebook.com/MerileeKernOfficial / LinkedIN www.LinkedIn.com/in/MerileeKern.

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